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the girl with no middle
Dec. 4th, 2006 10:19 pmWhen I was growing up, our family car, the first car I ever drove, and my vehicular Twu Wuv was an '82 Saab Turbo. My father totaled the car halfway between Athens and Powell OH on Christmas Day 1992. There was an icy bridge and some blowing snow, we bounced across the road three times, and somehow none of us were hurt and we ended up back in the direction we were headed. The car had only a couple gears functional--either 2nd and 4th or 3rd and 5th--and no reverse. We drove the remaining hour or so (which took a lot longer, since we were all shaken) and the car did so well, even with its two solitary gears, that we decided the car would probably be okay and we sang the praises of Swedish steel. When we finally made it, we looked at the front end and were appalled at the sudden concavity of it. It never drove again.
I'm feeling a little gearless lately. I can't move at all, or I'm in overdrive. One day I am impossibly despondent and there's no reason to make contact with anyone or get off the couch. The next day I realize how much is undone, and there's simply no time to socialize because of my massive to-do list. I haven't heard from one of my close friends in several weeks and had begun pouting about it, thinking maybe I had said something to offend her. Then I looked over my schedule for the last many weeks and checked the last time I tried to make contact, and realized that maybe it wasn't her fault at all.
As for my actual middle, it is fine and remaining stable. I worried last week that my clothes were too tight but in truth it's probably the several layers I'm having to wear due to extreme lack of temperature around here. The air conditioner is still in the window, and we're behind on all the rest of our weatherproofing as well. For once, I wish there were a few more delinquent young men hanging around our neighborhood that I could bribe into pulling the a/c unit out of the window, onto its rollers, and back into its secure location. It's just too big a job for Elwood and I by ourselves. We could invite folks over, but I believe I've already mentioned how bad I've been about calling lately. Or we could just bundle under some more blankets and try to convince ourselves we'll be gone before we do too much winter here anyway.
I'm feeling a little gearless lately. I can't move at all, or I'm in overdrive. One day I am impossibly despondent and there's no reason to make contact with anyone or get off the couch. The next day I realize how much is undone, and there's simply no time to socialize because of my massive to-do list. I haven't heard from one of my close friends in several weeks and had begun pouting about it, thinking maybe I had said something to offend her. Then I looked over my schedule for the last many weeks and checked the last time I tried to make contact, and realized that maybe it wasn't her fault at all.
As for my actual middle, it is fine and remaining stable. I worried last week that my clothes were too tight but in truth it's probably the several layers I'm having to wear due to extreme lack of temperature around here. The air conditioner is still in the window, and we're behind on all the rest of our weatherproofing as well. For once, I wish there were a few more delinquent young men hanging around our neighborhood that I could bribe into pulling the a/c unit out of the window, onto its rollers, and back into its secure location. It's just too big a job for Elwood and I by ourselves. We could invite folks over, but I believe I've already mentioned how bad I've been about calling lately. Or we could just bundle under some more blankets and try to convince ourselves we'll be gone before we do too much winter here anyway.
